I'll Be Frank, Don't You Wish You Could Be Too

As is a popular trend with the ending of another calendar year, I'll Be Frank will release it's final Top-10 list of the year.

This time I will be looking at the greatest Frank's in the history of the world. Yep that's right, the whole history of the world.

What a great name. Many dignified human beings have been lucky enough to carry around this moniker. The name doesn't seem as prevalent in today's world with douchy names like Hunter, Skylar, and Ryder dominating kindergartens, so we have to go back in time to find some good ol' Franks.

Lets get started with some Honorable Mentions:

H.M. - Franklin Delano Roosevelt and Franklin Delano Romanowski







H.M. - Aretha Franklin - Won't get too much R-E-S-P-E-C-T on this sports site



When did Jabba the Hut get a weave?



H.M. - L. Frank Baum - Writer of The Wizard of Oz As Matt Ryan would say if he was wearing Ruby Slippers "There's No Place Like Home, There's No Place Like Home." Speaking of Atlanta, are they really this good? Do we really think they can win a Super Bowl? Personally I would rank them third in the NFC (behind Green Bay and New Orleans) and I have three AFCs better than them (New England, Pittsburgh, Baltimore). If the Super Bowl was played in the Georgia Dome then maybe I'd like their chances a little more. Luckily they will probably get the 1 seed in the NFC and play their games in their dome. Wouldn't a Philly-Hotlanta NFC championship game be kind of exciting.




H.M. - Frank Stallone - How is Sly the successful one?






H.M. - Anne Frank - You're gonna have to do more than hide in an attic to make this Top-10




H.M. - Frank Robinson - Hall of Famer before my time, I best remember him wilting away as the manager of the Expos and Nationals






H.M. - Frank Capra - What would Christmas be without It's a Wonderful Life?







H.M. - Frank Darabont - What would life be without Shawshank?






H.M. - Frank Thomas - The Big Hurt was always one of my favorite players. Of course growing up in the mid-90s every 12 year old's favorite player was Ken Griffey Jr., and I was no different. But being named Frank, he was my second favorite player. It was nice to see him finish his career off pretty strong with a good year in Oakland. What an underrated career really. He won multiple AL MVPs and dominated 90s pitching. If you asked me at this second, I would say second greatest nickname after Peyton Hillis' Avalanche.






H.M. - Frank Pietranglo- What a save




On that note, the Top-10 Franks of all time:

10. Frank the Tank - Not a huge Will Ferrell fan, but can't argue with this guy. "Once it hits your lips its so good!"




9. Frank Capelli - Anyone who grew up in Western PA will remember this mustachioed hero. Saw him in concert live at Hutchinson Elementary School. Yep he was that big a deal. Groupie teachers all looking for a mustache ride.



It's a good thing he was on-air before To Catch a Predator. Couldn't you just picture Chris Hansen telling Frank to have a seat and try some cookies and iced tea.


8. Frankenstein - If DeNiro thought he was good enough to portray, then he is good enough to make this list. Unless that DeNiro is the one from Righteous Kill, then we might have to rethink things. I don't know if any of you saw that movie, but it is DeNiro and Pacino's first collaboration since Heat. Obviously noone can complain about Heat, but Righteous Kill sucked. The two of them are Hollywood Icons, but I hate to admit it but they are past their primes when it comes to action and psychological thrillers (The Rock and Vin Diesel are now the kings of that scene). They need to stick to the Nursing Home for aging actors, Family Comedies.


7. Ron Francis - My favorite Penguin of all time. Blasphomy you might say, but of course I loved Mario, but I always like Ronnie Franchise a little more. It was probably because I had his jersey. Did you ever notice that if you own someone's jersey, you tend to stick up for that person more than you should. Like if you have a Brooks Orpik jersey and he takes a stupid hooking penalty (something he does from time-to-time) and someone in your group starts bad mouthing him, you tend to say Whoa Whoa Whoa, it wasn't that bad, it was a horrible call by the ref.

Anyways good news today. Francis will be lacing them up with Mario, Paul Coffey and Brian Trottier for the Pens Old-Timers as they face off against Capital Old-Timers on New Years Eve at Heinz Field as a way to open up the Winter Classic ceremonies. I hope for Washington Joey Juneau and Jim Carrey lace them up for the Caps. Full rosters will be released later in the week.





6. Ben Franklin - I guess he did some good things, most notable he played a pivotal role in National Treasure.




5. Frank Sinatra - Lived a pretty good life if you ask me.






4. Frank Reynolds - Always Sunny stepped it up a notch when they brought in DeVito in Season 2. I have been a little critical the past few seasons, saying the show has been reaching a little, but anytime they pair Frank and Charlie, it is still television gold.





3. Frankfurters - Who doesn't like a good ol' American classic. What says baseball and America better than hotdogs. We even celebrate the nation's birthday with sickos jamming as many of these delicasies down their gullets as possible. People are always saying that if you knew what was in a hotdog you wouldn't eat it ever again. Well guess what, how about you don't tell me what's in it, because I don't care. They are delicious. If you don't want to eat any more dogs thats fine you Commy bastard, more for me and the rest of us red-blooded Americans.



2. Frank Costanza - I gotta a lot of problems with you people.





1. Uncle Frank McAllister -