Sunday, October 31, 2010

Friday, October 29, 2010

College Football Week 9

Halloween weekend brings a slate of games that can be compared to "Trick or Treat" in the afternoon or every "Scream" movie; below average despite what you have heard. The most important games this weekend feature spreads around a TD and you would not be incorrect to assume that the SEC West is on a bye week. This is a good Saturday night to watch the World Series, Hockey Night in Canada, or go to a Halloween party. This might even be a good Saturday to go to Pittsburgh for the Pitt/Louisville homecoming game, on second thought maybe that statement is going too far.


Louisville @ Pittsburgh (-9.5): Each week at illbefrank we try to pick the important games, but this week we are making an exception for this game as some of our most dedicated readers are headed to this game and making it a weekend, so we are picking it for them. Both teams are 4-3 and have been playing better recently as Pittsburgh is 2-0 in conference, while L'Ville is 1-1 coming off a shutout of UConn. First year L'Ville coach Charlie Strong will need that same type of defensive performance as Pittsburgh will feature a ground game led by Ray Graham (7.6 yds/carry), who has turned Dion Lewis (4.5 yds/carry) into a change of pace back. It is hard to believe that Pitt can give over 9 points when their most impressive win is over Syracuse, but that sums up the state of this basketball conference. Speaking of basketball my lasting L'Ville memories in Pittsburgh are when L'Ville (G) DeJaun Wheat led the underdog Cardinals to within 1 game of the Final Four on a bad ankle in the Civic Arena (aka the coldest basketball venue ever). For our dedicated readers we will go with Pitt to win the game and L'Ville to cover the 9 and a hook for DeJuan Wheat.


Michigan State @ Iowa (-6.5): Two teams that we have been high on all year battle this weekend in the last game Mich. St. will be an underdog in this year. Both teams have solid defenses and conservative offense's led by QB's who could switch jerseys and no one would know the difference. This game should be tight and Iowa coach Kirk Ferentz has displayed recent clock management skills I have only ever seen from Andy Reid. Iowa's defense has also allowed games to get close late and has been unable to get the big stop, while Mich. St. showed an ability to hang tough after failing behind last week @NW. I had this line at Iowa -3 before I saw the spread and Mich. St. just reinstating CB Chris Rucker one day after his release from jail is a move only a team that thinks big would pull making Mich. St. and the points the play.


Florida vs. Georgia (-2.5) in Jacksonville: What has been more disappointing this season the play of the SEC East and these two teams in particular or the feeling you got from watching "The Situation" this season on the Miami edition of Jersey Shore? Both leave you repeating the phrase "What happened" and leave you with alternate feelings of being scared and feeling bad for everyone involved. Both teams are still in contention for taking a beating in the SEC title game and Georgia (WR) A.J. Green vs. UF (CB) Janoris Jenkins is a NFL matchup. I was hoping to bring back ties for this game and any game where you expect a tie is a good opportunity to take the points.


Utah (-7) @ Air Force: For my money the best game of the day, Utah is a veteran team that should give TCU a game in November, but Air Force on the road will not be easy as the Utah defense has not faced a ground game as versatile as Air Force's. Air Force (RB's) Asher Clark and Jared Tew combine with (QB) Tim Jefferson, who is averaging 5.8 yds/carry, to form an offense that gave Oklahoma all they could handle earlier this season. I love trends and 12 of the past 13 times these two teams played the game has been decided by 10 points or less. Air Force will need their defense to play the best game of their season and the home field should help that happen making Air Force and the points the play.


Missouri @ Nebraska (-7.5): Missouri's defense held up remarkably well last week in the upset win over Oklahoma and comes into this game giving up an average of 13.6 pts/game. The defensive confidence from last week will be much needed against a Nebraska offense that found their Mojo last week vs. Oklahoma State. Missouri LB/SS Andrew Gachkar will be given the responsibility of shadowing Nebraska QB Taylor Martinez and this matchup will go a long way in determining the game's outcome. Missouri QB Blaine Gabbert could insert his name in the Heisman conversation with a 2-0 mark vs. OK and Nebraska, which he is capable of doing if his offensive line can hold up this week as well as last week. I don't see that on the road this week making Nebraska the play.


Oregon (-7) @ USC: The Ducks have been the most dominate team in college football this year with their basketball on grass offense. (QB) Darron Thomas and (RB) LaMichael James (7.2 yds/carry) led an offense that has worn down defenses by the fourth quarter of games this season. That is going to be a big problem for a USC team that has depth problems due to the Pete Carroll era. Oregon's closest game all season was an 11 point road victory @ Arizona State and I don't see that changing this week even if USC is referring to this game as their bowl game.


Stanford (-7) @ Washington: Both teams started the season with Heisman hopeful QB's and ideas of contending for the Pac 10 title. Stanford is the only team left with those hopes and that will be reinforced Saturday.


Tuesday, October 26, 2010

Just do it already

Right now it's 11 p.m. EST on Tuesday October 26, 2010.

How do Wade Phillips, with his 1-5 record, and Norv Turner and his 2-5 record still have jobs?

Sure, when the playoffs come, these two are expected to choke worse than Lawrence Fishburne's daughter at a deep-throating convention, but to start the season off with a combined 3-10 record, this is unbelievable.

Both teams were on a short list of favorites to represent their respective conferences in the Super Bowl.

Jerry Jones had grand plans for the 'Boys to have a home game for the Super Bowl.

The Chargers were expected to come out hungry after being upset by the Jets last January.

Really what is going to happen is that there is no chance they make the playoffs now, but they will start winning games and take them out of position for a top-10 pick. Both teams will have picks in the teens and this season will be a complete bust. If you are going to lose you might as well get something good out of it.

Let's look at some reasons why these teams stink:

Dallas:

Miles Austin is dating Kryptonite Kim.
Felix Jones is not a legit featured back.
Romo is simply a good fantasy quarterback.
Jimmy Johnson couldn't even win Survivor.
Their kick returner's name is Akwasi Owusu-Ansah and is from IUP. I know people that went to IUP, enough said.
Dez Bryant's mom was a hooker.
Wade Phillips' dad's name is a direct adjective that describes Wade as a coach - Bum
Emmitt Smith's HOF speech was way too long.
Emmitt Smith stopped using Just for Men.


San Diego:

Philip "cry me a" Rivers is a douche
Vincent Jackson held out, so did Marcus McNeill
Ryan Mathews is not ready to carry a full workload
Shawn Merriman is still on the payroll
Tom has grown an awful beard
L.T. wasn't washed up
Norv Turner has a turkey neck
The Padres choked
Discovered by the Germans in 1904, they named it San Diego, which of course in German means a whale's vagina

NBA Total Time


Even in the most anticipated NBA season in years it is hard to find a lot of value in NBA futures this year with a clear distinction between contenders and pretenders. Luckily there are always win total bets and below are the win totals for all NBA teams and some thoughts and plays.


Minnesota (23.5) New Jersey (25.5) Toronto (26.5) Sacramento (27.5)


The biggest lock of this group locks to be Toronto to go under, a quick scan of their roster left me wondering if 20 wins was optimistic for this group. I like DeMar DeRozan's upside and as a fantasy sleeper, but to ask him to carry the offense and make winning plays in half court sets is unrealistic at this point in his career and with his supporting cast. Minnesota is right where they belong with the lowest win total in the league and after the off-season they have had I find it very hard to believe that they will win 24 games, which would be a 9 game improvement from last season. New Jersey should be dramatically improved with new coach Avery Johnson, who is good for 10 wins on his own, and some professional vets around Devin Harris and Brook Lopez. I also think Sacramento and the over is a good play, the Kings won 25 games last year and the natural progression of Tyreke Evans should be enough for them to improve on that number. Demarcus Cousins, Carl Landry, and Jason Thompson are all big guys who can run and finish and if coach Paul Westphal can keep them all engaged the Kings could be a mild surprise this season.


Cleveland (29.5) Golden State (30.5) Detroit (31.5)


Detroit seems to be headed for a major roster shakeup and with both Rip Hamilton and Tayshaun Prince on the trading block it is likely the Pistons will be counting on Tracy McGrady and Charlie Villaneuva to play heavy minutes sooner rather than later, making the under look like a very appealing play. Cleveland also seems like a natural under with the Cavs counting on Mo Williams, who was contemplating retirement after "The Decision" and a division that outside of Detroit is improved. I have no feel on Golden State as 30 wins seems about right, but I know they will be exciting all season and a prime reason to purchase the NBA live ticket.


Washington (34.5) Indiana (34.5) Philadelphia (35.5) New York (35.5) LAC (36.5)


This is a swing group of teams that could either take a step up to playoff contention or a step back to scouting top 5 college talent. I think Philly will be scouting college talent come February as rookie Evan Turner looks to be in over his head this year and Andre Iguodala might lead the team in rebounding as big men Elton Brand and Spencer Hawes seem more interesting in testing their range. The Knicks are one of my must plays as Stoudemire will put up major numbers in the east and Felton makes the Knicks mediocre at the point which is a major improvement from last year. It looks like Carmelo Anthony will force his way out of Denver and to New York by February at the latest which also makes the over a calculated play. The Clippers are also a team that looks poised for improvement as Blake Griffin and Chris Kaman will be a force together down low and Eric Gordon looked like a top 5 shooting guard in Turkey over the summer. This young team with coach Vinny Del Negro looks like a perfect opportunity for Baron Davis to show he is still a capable point guard when invested and that should be enough to push the Clipps over the win total and into the playoff discussion. Washington also has a bright future with young talent, but until Arenas and his team sinking personality is moved they are always going to be on the verge of trouble. 34 wins seems right for an eastern conference team with Danny Granger and Darren Collison as their two best players.


Memphis (38.5) Charlotte (39.5) New Orleans (40.5)


Memphis should be right around the number and I could support the over with that starting five and coach Lionel Hollins. Hopefully for Memphis Rudy Gay will continue to work after this contract and Mike Conley and O.J. Mayo form one of the quickest backcourts in the NBA. Any help from bench guys like Tony Allen, Acie Law, and Hasheem Thabeet could push the Griz to .500. Charlotte and New Orleans both look ready to take major steps back this year. Larry Brown has to be very concerned about his team with D.J. Augustin at the point and Kwame Brown, Nazr Mohammed, and DeSagana Diop playing in the middle. The Bobcats have plenty of check out guys including their coach and this roster has plenty of holes. It is hard to bet against Chris Paul, but I think he was on target questioning the Hornet's talent level this summer and by the All-Star break I suspect we will hear the same questions.


Phoenix (42.5) Denver (43.5) Milwaukee (45.5) Chicago (46.5) Atlanta (46.5)


Steve Nash's team has won at least 45 games in every season and though the Suns look to be down this year I think Nash will make the sum of Robin Lopez, Hedo Turkoglu, Hakim Warrick, and Josh Childress better than the individual parts. Billups will follow Carmelo out of Denver once he is traded and the Nugget's will re-build making the under a solid play. The Bucks have added talent and should continue to improve under Scott Skiles in year two; I like the over especially when you consider that they won 46 games last season. Chicago and Atlanta are interesting teams with the same total, though I think Chicago will be the more feared team come playoff time I think they will need some time to learn new coach Tom Thibodeau and for Carlos Boozer to get healthy and acclimated. Atlanta brings everyone back from a team that won 53 games last season and I think they are a better bet to go over the win total in the regular season and to flame out early come playoff time.


Houston (47.5) Utah (49.5) Dallas (49.5) Portland (50.5) San Antonio (50.5)


Utah made a major upgrade down low with the addition of Al Jefferson to replace Carlos Boozer and I think Deron Williams will emerge with Jefferson and Millsap and the Jazz to improve on their 53 wins from last year. Dallas has won at least 50 games in 11 straight years making this 49.5 win total very interesting for a team that looks to be past their window. San Antonio is another team that appears to be on the back nine, but youthful additions like Tiago Splitter, DeJuan Blair and George Hill are good pieces if Duncan and Ginobili are healthy. Portland and Houston are both teams that should be around 50 wins with their respective rosters, but the major question with both teams is health. The Blazers lost more many games to injury last year than any other team and if either team gets 30 games from their centers it would be a major surprise.


Oklahoma City (52.5) Boston (53.5) Orlando (56.5) LAL (57.5) Miami (64.5)


The Thunder won 50 games last season and are on the verge of a major breakthrough with a young team that is growing around superstar Kevin Durant. Depth in the paint and continued improvement from Westbrook and Harden make the over a must play. You have to think Kobe will be using the regular season as a chance to rest his knees and fine tune. The Lakers are not going to be afraid of road playoff games and I think that will show in their regular season win total and like Boston last year they will go under the win total in the regular season and be a force in May. Boston coasted to 50 wins last season and an improved bench should allow them to overtake Orlando as the second best team in the east this regular season. Miami will be the biggest game on their opponent's schedule every night this year and I think they will play accordingly and take a run at 70 wins. The bigger question will be if this strategy is going to hurt them in the playoffs. Wade and James have already been dinged up this pre-season and though it might be smarter to rest throughout the year I don't think the pressure that came with this off-season will allow them any nights off. For that reason I wouldn't bet against the Heat to go over the win total even if they wear themselves down in the process.


NBA Preview 3 - THE WEST

For the Eastern Conference Best/Worst Case Scenarios, check out NBA Preview Part 2.



Melo’s (Potentially-Partial) Final Season with the Denver Nuggets

Glass half-full - They come out of the gates strong, raising the price for any team wanting to pry Carmelo away. In December, they finally give in to the Nets, getting Derrick Favors, Terrence Williams, and 2 unprotected first round picks. They decide to go all in on rebuilding the team by trading Billups and Kenyon Martin to a contender for expiring contracts and another first rounder. Instead of losing these players for nothing, they now head into the next two seasons with Favors (3rd overall pick), five first round selections (including their own), and about $30 million in cap space. Not bad.

Glass half empty
- They refuse to give in to Melo’s trade requests and keep hoping that he’ll sign their extension offer. Melo’s sulking begins to bring down the rest of the team. (I know you’re thinking guys like J.R. Smith and Kenyon Martin wouldn’t let another players attitude affect their own, but let’s assume it does.) The team wallows it’s way to a 34-win season. Melo is so upset at the way the team treated him that he refuses to be part of a sign-and-trade, and willfully takes less money in free agency just to screw Denver over.





OK City Thunder


Glass half-full - Durant somehow continues to improve exponentially with every game he plays. He becomes the youngest two-time scoring champion with a ridiculous line of 33 ppg, 9 boards, 4 assists, 2 steals, and 1.5 blocks. Russell Westbrook moves himself firmly to the bottom of the upper echelon of point guards (Deron Williams, Chris Paul, Steve Nash, Derrick Rose, Rajon Rondo, Westbrook.) Those two lead the best cast of young role players in recent memory to the best record in the west. They role through the Jazz and Spurs in the first two rounds. In the conference finals, after Matt Barnes and Ron Artest allow Durant to put up 40 in Game 1, Kobe takes it upon himself (and his bad knees) to guard Durant. He completely wears himself out on the defensive end in a futile effort and Pau can’t do enough offensively to carry LA. In the first matchup of what will become the rivalry of the 10’s, Durant averages 42 per game against the Heat in the finals. The Thunder’s superior role players are the difference and Seattle cries as OKC wins in 7.

Glass half-empty - Barring injuries, I really don’t see anyway this team falls apart. They don’t have one questionable character on their roster. I think the basement for this team is about 48 wins and the 5th seed in the West. Of course, if Durant goes down, hello lottery.





San Antonio Spurs


Glass half-full - It will be an odd (number-wise) year by the time the finals come around, so you can’t count Duncan & Friends out. With the maturation of DeJuan Blair and the addition of Brazilian Tiago Splitter, Duncan is able to keep his minutes in the upper 20’s for the regular season. Manu Ginobili leads the team to another 50-win season. With a fresh Duncan, the Spurs oust the Jazz in the first round, and push the Lakers to six games in round 2. I think that’s probably the ceiling for this team from now on.

Glass half-empty
- Everyone goes down to injuries and they have to rely on Richard Jefferson to do something.




LA Lakers

Glass half-full
- Sasha Vujacic’s poor play is such a turn off that it forces Maria Sharapova into the arms of someone out of the spotlight, possibly a 20-something white guy with a kick-ass beard who, as a hobby, writes for a blog that freely mixes posts about the NBA with top-ten Halloween character lists. But, as far as basketball, they complete Phil Jackson’s 4th three-peat and Kobe ties MJ’s 6 titles.

Glass half-empty
- Sharapova goes through with the wedding, Artest goes AWOL after the all star break and is finally found in mid-April, shirtless in a small town in Iowa, freestyling to a group of stoned high school kids with no recollection of the past 3 months, and Kobe can’t take the lingering pain anymore, opting for season ending surgery, so he can make a healthy run next year.


Predictions


East

Playoff Seeds

1) Miami
2) Orlando
3) Boston
4) Chicago
5) Milwaukee
6) New York
7) Atlanta
8) Charlotte

Conference Finals - Miami over Boston in 7

West

Playoff Seeds

1) Lakers
2) Dallas
3) OKC
4) Utah
5) Phoenix
6) Houston
7) San Antonio
8) Portland

Conference Finals - Lakers over OKC in 6

Finals - I’m not really going out on a limb here, but I’ll say Lakers over Heat in 6

Sunday, October 24, 2010

Halloween

You gotta love Halloween, it's the only time of the year when good girls can let their inner slut shine. Not only are the girls looking good, holding on to that last bit of summer tan, and not yet having packed on their winter hibernation weight, but just the whole concept of Halloween is great. Dressing up in whatever strikes your fancy, crisp October air, with just enough warmth to allow for some final time spent in the outdoors. The idea of giving up your comfort zone for the chance to be scared shitless, now this is a real holiday.


Halloween is my favorite holiday. It's a time to get creative with your costume, get together with friends and just enjoy the thrill of a night dedicated to the spooky and undead. Because everyone is in costume, it seems that inhibitions are lightened and everyone is generally in a better mood, willing to have more fun. Personally, I think its better than being forced around a table and having to talk through forced conversations with family members you don't really want to talk to, as with Thanksgiving and Christmas.

Admittedly, I am not a huge horror film buff. I can watch horror movies with other people in the room, but if I'm by myself, I'm a little girl about it. Those kind of movies put me on edge, and embarrassingly enough it takes a few days for me to quit looking over my shoulder.

It's been a while since we've had a countdown on here. I know I still have to finish up my WWF countdown, but that will have to wait for another post, because right now, I amd counting down my Top-10 Scariest characters in cinematic history. As always, this is my list and because I am not a horror connoisseur this will only include movies that I have seen and enjoyed.

10. Willy Wonka - Willy Wonka & the Chocolate Factory (1971)



Maybe a bit of a surprise to be included on a Halloween Scariest characters list, but if you think about it, Gene Wilder's Willy Wonka is plenty scary in its own right. I mean, great movie, a classic, but there is something a little off about a man who has 100s of orange midgets living in his basement. Not to mention, he does have an extra little infatuation for children that is bordering on the likes of Michael Jackson. The fact that he lures these children into his factory and one-by-one they disappear, is a basic premise of horror movies. The nonchalant way in which he reacts to the children's misfortune is creepy. Its not intended to be a horror movie, but it does have its dark points so for that we give Willy a spot on our list.





9. Pennywise the Clown - IT (1990)



I'm not one to be scared of clowns, actually I find them kind of funny, but Pennywise from Stephen King's It, gives clowns a whole new image.

It was a made for TV movie, so it hasn't been as widely seen as some of the other film's and villans on this list, but Pennywise is no joke. Stephen King is a master writer of all things scary and supernatural, and this movie is no different.

I've never read the book, but I've been told it contains more horror elements than the movie. The movie in itself isn't so much scary as it is unnerving. Just the idea of a clown killing children is very King-esque.

Pennywise isn't all that scary, in fact, I find him to be rather humorous, but the mixing of his killings and the joyful carnival music that accompanies his murders is a nice contrast.

So for those of you who haven't seen the movie, basically it is about a group of outcast kids, who in the 1960s were terrorized by a demon clown that fed on the fears of children and killed them. The group was able to defeat the clown as kids, but 30 years later he resurfaces, and the group, now adults, must band together to defeat him again. Kind of a wishy washy premise, but Pennywise deserves a spot on this list.




8. Jaws - Jaws (1975)



I wasn't born yet, but from the accounts I've seen and read, this movie had more of an impact on coastal vacations than the BP oil spill. The idea of a killer shark lurking near the shore and gobbling up unsuspecting tourists is a concept that was not contemplated before Steven Spielberg's 1975 horror classic. Really the movie has given sharks a bad name, but who cares they are sharks and anything that can open its mouth, expose rows and rows of flesh tearing teeth, and can end my life with one chomp, deserves to have a bad name. I like going into the ocean, but when you're out there, there's always that little bit of fear because of the unknown which is swimming mere inches beneath the surface of the water.

Yes, sharks are scary, but what really makes this film a horror classic, is Spielberg's use of the music to create a sense of anxiety and panic. No film before, used music as a way to foreshadow the upcoming events. When you hear that imfamous Jaws theme, you instantly know something bad is about to happen. You know it's going to happen, but you don't know when, where or why. That's what makes this movie scary, the anticipation of what is going to happen. This ploy will be a favorite for all horror flicks that followed.





7. Blair Witch - The Blair Witch Project (1999)



So when I first saw this movie in theaters, the news that this film was fake wasn't yet released. So I left the movies that night thinking that this footage was real, and that three kids were murdered in the woods. Okay, looking back it was naive to think that, but I was only 13 at the time. No studio would release a snuff film that shows three people being tortured by a mysterious "witch," but to the filmmakers credit, they held out long enough to rake in tons of cash for this low-budget production.

Filming the whole movie, using a hand-held camera is just a cool premise, the idea that three people are filming a documentary about a local legend and then they fall victim to this legend is a great concept.

The hysteria of the actors adds that little extra that the audience needed to sit through the 2 hours of footage, and lets be honest, not much action takes place for the majority of the film, but the movie still captivated people nationwide.

Obviously the finding of the tongue was a creepy part, but the ending in the shack with all the children handprints was a great way to cap this cult classic.





6. Samara Morgan - The Ring (2002)




Gotta state the obvious, Naomi Watts is pretty damn hot in this movie.




The Ring wasn't as much scary as it was creepy and disturbing, with the little girl being the most disturbing of all the characters. When she pops out of the tv and does that spider/crab walk thing, that is pretty stunning.

It was a good movie, because the plot was actually that of a real movie, not just a horror/slasher film.

Not going to lie, couldn't actually watch the clip below for its entirety.




5. Jason Voorhees - Friday the 13th (1980)



Well as everyone knows by now, Jason's mom was the killer in the first movie, so really Pamela Voorhees should be added to this spot in the rankings. Anyways this original film spawned countless sequels that have the goalie-masked machete wielding psycho terrorizing sex and drug addled teens across the country. If you're doing drugs or having sex, you will die. That's that.

Jason was derived in the form of the methodical killer that destroys all in his path without compassion. If you are in reach of the machete, you will be hacked up. Usain Bolt couldn't even run fast enough to escape Jason's wrath. Doesn't matter what you do, how much of a head start you have on this guy, somehow you will fall down, break your leg or ankle, get caught in a deadend and be slashed to pieces.

The movie is a typical slasher film, but the ending of the original unveils the ultimate surprise. A true classic ending. The song makes it.





4. Chucky - Child's Play (1988)



The ultimate movie to give a child a nightmare. This came out when I was 2, not that I saw this when I was 2-years-old, but it definately left an impression on my childhood after I did see it. How wouldn't this be scary to a kid, a murderer whose soul is now in a child's toy. Yeah that's scary shit. A doll coming to life is one thing, but a ginger doll coming to life, is on a completely new scale of horrific, even for adults. We don't like real gingers invading our lives in normal circumstances, but a killer doll with red hair and freckles, that's too much.

Anyways I remember checking my stuffed animals before bed to make sure that they weren't going to stab me in my sleep. Yeah lame, but I'm sure I wasn't the only one.

Looking back at it, if this little ginger killer was chasing me around, I would boot the shit out of it. The whole doll/killer thing was a terrifying combination, how could they possible have imagined and engineered a Carrot Top and that munchkin, Deep Roy from Eastbound and Down, combination killer? Now that ingenuity.




3. Freddy Krueger - A Nightmare on Elm Street (1984)



Wes Craven spawned Freddy out of the successes of the newly discovered slasher genre led by Halloween and Friday the 13th. Craven didn't create Freddy to be a brute serial killer that dominated physically, he wanted his creature to torture his victims psychologically, before he wounded them mortally.

So what you had was a Freudian killer, who ravaged your mind and dreams before killing you while you slept. Definately a change of pace from what horror fans were becoming accustomed to, but nonetheless effective.

An icon of the horror world, Freddy will forever remain the cause for the creation of Adderall and 5-hour Energy drinks.




2. Boogerlips - Ernest Scared Stupid (1991)



I know, I know, the Ernest movies were jokes, but this happens to be one of my favorite Halloween movies, and since this is my list I can put ol' Boogerlips anywhere I want.

Hell, when I was a kid, I couldn't get through the scene where the troll sneaks up on the little girl in bed and turns her into a little figurine. It took me multiple tries to finish the movie and find out that the only way to defeat this troll is by spraying it with Miak.

Great special effects.

Jim Varney was an underrated comedic actor. All his movies are pretty funny and he should have gotten more credit than he did for those roles. No they weren't Oscar worthy, or even Razzie worthy for that sake, but they are entertaining and a very good find when nothing else is on tv.




1. Michael Myers - Halloween (1978)



The original, and still the best. Michael Myers is the patriarch of all slasher villians. He was the first, and everything since has just been trying to keep up.

Saw my first pair of boobs while watching this movie in elementary school, so yeah, can't forget something like that.

This movie is Halloween. Michael Myers is Halloween. Who would have thought that a simple Captain Kirk mask turned inside out, paired with a butcher's knife, and some easy to play piano notes would turn into such an iconic member of the film history.

The emotionless and methodic rampage that Michael levels on Haddonfield is awesome. He can't be stopped. You know he is coming by the music, but you never know where he will show up. You can't get away from him, he doesn't care, he will walk as slow as possible and still get you, that's how tough he is. In reality, there is 0% chance of him catching me if I was running, but some idiot girls don't understand you shouldn't lock yourself in a house when a manic murderer is after you.

This is one of the only films, that if on tv, I will stop what I am doing and watch it, no matter what time of year. Even though I've seen it countless times, I still feel uneasy after its over.

Rob Zombie tried to take the remake in its own direction, but what he failed to realize is that there was no need for a remake, the original was the perfect horror movie.





What would Halloween be without Thriller

Saturday, October 23, 2010

Thank You Texas Rangers!

Thank You Texas for making the World Series watch-able this year, which is more than we can we say for Nick Swisher's finance Joanna Garcia's soon to be cancelled sitcom "Better With You". Thank You for pounding mediocre Yankee pitching like Hughes, HGH Pettitte and the entire bullpen. Thank You for bringing back memories of the post-season Cleveland Indian CC Sabathia that we all know and love. Thank You for stealing more bases on washed up Jorge Posada than he has stolen salary money over the past 5 years. Thank You for proving what we all knew about Brett Gardner, Marcus Thames, and Nick Swisher; that they are all platoon players know matter jersey that happen to be wearing. Thank You for showing us that any contract Jeter gets over a million/year this off season is a total joke like his finance's acting job on CW's cancelled after 4 episodes "Body Politic" and for showing us that Jeter is J.J. Hardy in pinstripes. Thank You for allowing Curtis Granderson and A. J. Burnett to show that giving them big money is like giving it to Bernie Madoff. Thank You for not allowing Lance Berkman and Kerry Wood to "earn" World Series rings, which is like saying Hal Steinbrenner earned his bank account and title. Thank You for not allowing this season to be dedicated to George Steinbrenner; I mean really the guy was a total jerk, a tyrant, and a convicted criminal (This is like saying we need to bring back Don King to help turn around boxing). Thank You for sparing us from having to see clips of Yankee fans in the stands or what is also known as a casting call for "Jersey Shore 2"; you can tell a true Yankee fan if they admit they have never seen a Yankee comeback since they leave every game the Yankee's are losing by 2 in the 7th inning. Thank You for eliminating the times I have to hear Joe Buck say "Destiny" and "Mystic" like he is hosting the AVN Awards. Thank You for giving Mark "The Mercenary" Teixeira a chance to do what we all knew he would do when times got tough, bail and blame it on an injury, he said he was out for the season before he pulled up lame. Thank You for ending the opportunities for A-Fraud to step out of the box between pitches and pose for the cameras, who are you posing for A-Fraud, Tara Reid? She seems to fit the pattern after Cameron Diaz and Kate Hudson, over the hill blonds who how can I say this nicely, have batted around a few times.

I don't know if I have said this enough, Thank You Texas Rangers!

Thursday, October 21, 2010

Week 8 college football


Week 8 of the college football season is the first week of the BCS and AP polls and this week also has BCS #1 Oklahoma on the road in a big game as the Big 12 conference takes the stage with the best games of the weekend. I like delaying the BCS standings release date until the middle of the season so much that they should take the next step and not release them until December. The only problem I see with this is that ESPN would get concerned that Mark May would run out of things to talk about after repeating his incorrect "this is why the college game is so great, every week is a playoff" mantra (tell that to Boise and TCU), but this would really be a benefit since it would give ESPN more time to show Dr. Lou's speeches. Dr. Lou is not comfortable in the studio giving his game analysis and sometimes it even makes you question how much football this wildly successful coach knows until you hear his Dr. Lou speeches. They are really great, I bet some coaches actually repeat his speeches to their players and his life lesson speeches are even better. I caught one he was giving to NASCAR drivers Jeff Gordon and Jimmie Johnson and the way he turned everything into teamwork and family was quite impressive, I can see Dr. Lou mentoring troubled athletes soon like Tony Dungy. Brett Favre might even actually have something to say at a press conference after a sit down with Dr. Lou. Watching Gameday/Scoreboard just for the Dr. Lou speeches reminds me of the way I am watching the Real World/Road Rules challenge "Cutthroat" this season, I could care less about the challenges and elimination "gulag" so far this season, making the drama in the house the must see and even that has been sub-par so far this season. Way too many competitors and we need to start eliminating people 2 at a time, spending 10 minutes of air time on Big Easy's feelings is as big of a waste of time as A-Rod stepping out of the box for ten minutes between each pitch to pose for the cameras. It is great to hear host TJ Lavin is improving from his injuries after his horrific crash I just hope the same can be said about the rest of the season of his show. As for the weekly plays:


Wiscy @ Iowa (-5.5): Wiscy was more than impressive last week in the "Johnny Banana's" like beat down of former #1 OSU. The offensive line and RB John Clay dominated the Buckeyes on the ground and their defense was opportunistic when given the early lead. This week is a matchup of strength vs. strength as Wiscy takes their #12th rank run game into Iowa City vs. the #7 ranked run defense in the country. A barometer of the game will be a matchup of two first round picks in next year's NFL draft, Wiscy LT Gabe Carimi vs. Iowa DE Adrian Clayborn in what is sure to be a physical game. This game screams classic let down for Wiscy and Iowa has been on a mission since their special teams meltdown loss @ Arizona. I think Iowa will slow Clay and force QB Scott Tolzien to throw more than Wiscy coach Brett Bielma would like as he tries to beat his alma mater making Iowa -5.5 the play.


Mich. St (-5.5) @ Northwestern: Two interesting stats in this game; Mich. St. is (7-0) with all of their wins coming in the state of Michigan and Northwestern (5-1) has been a favorite in every game they played so far this season. NW QB Dan Persa has been successful running the spread, but the Mich St. defense led by LB Greg Jones is a lot more athletic and physical than Purdue or Minny. The Spartan defense roughed up Mich QB Denard Robinson and they will do the same to Persa. NW's special teams and penalty issues will cost them against a team that is playing well in all three phases and I expect Spartan fans to turn Evanston into a neutral site game making MSU -5.5 the play.


LSU @ Auburn (-6): The winner of this game will be the only remaining unbeaten team in the SEC and put themselves in the driver's seat on the road to Atlanta. Auburn QB Cam Newton has been unstoppable this season, but the LSU defense will be the most athletic he has seen this year. Weaknesses collide when LSU has the ball as they will take a pass game that hasn't thrown for over 100 yards in 4 games this season against an Auburn secondary that has regularly given up 400 yards through the air. Look for LSU QB Jarrett Lee to get the majority of the snaps late as he was decent in their win @ Florida two weeks ago. Both teams seem to relish close games late, but as we talked about last week Auburn looks to be a team that is catching all the breaks and last week vs. Arkansas further proved this point with the Mallett injury and defensive scores in the fourth quarter. There isn't a more shaky undefeated team than Les Miles' Tigers. Cam Newton, home field, and what looks like fate make Auburn (-6) the play.


Oklahoma (-3) @ Missouri: The Gameday crew heads to Columbia for the second biggest game of the day (behind Auburn/LSU) as Oklahoma takes their #1 BCS ranking on the road. Mizzou QB Blaine Gabbert and OK QB Landry Jones have both been good this year, but the team that can establish the run will have a big advantage in a game featuring the two defenses that lead the Big 12 in sacks this season. Oklahoma has been living on the edge all season on the road and as all "Lone Star" fans can tell you, it doesn't matter where you start the season or in this case the BCS. I like Mizzou to establish the run and Oregon to be the BCS #1 next week making Mizzou + 3 the play.


Nebraska (-5.5) @ Oklahoma State: Another game featuring a great matchup as Ok ST WR Justin Blackmon matches up against Nebraska CB Prince Amukamara. Texas unveiled the defensive game plan necessary to stop Nebraska and QB Taylor Martinez and though Ok St. doesn't have the athletes Texas does I think they can hold Nebraska in the 20's. Ok. St. RB Kendall Hunter will need to be a factor and the Cowboy WR's other than Blackmon will need to be productive at home. 5.5 seems like too much for a team at home that is improving every week making Ok St. the play.


GTech @ Clemson (-6): Tech as an underdog in conference play under coach Paul Johnson is a strong trend that is worth riding.


Houston @ SMU (-7.5): SMU is improved, healthy, and hungry for a win in this rivalry game.


Tuesday, October 19, 2010

First Trip to Consol

Last night I was able to make my first trip to Consol Energy Center. Granted my maiden voyage followed the likes of Lady Gaga, Paul McCartney, and my own mother, who hasn't been to a Penguin game since before I was born. So needless to say I was late to the party.

So everything seemed the same as it would if I were going to Mellon/Civic Arena, same route to the game, same parking lot, same amount of booze consumed before, but then it all changed.

My first impression of the new arena was somewhat of a downer due to the fact that noone working the facility had any idea what they were doing and where to direct fans. After taking a round-about way, we finally entered the building and made our way to the new Lexus club. For all intents and purposes, it's still the Igloo club to me. One cool thing that I noticed was that as you walk past the massive suites, if you run your ticket across the barcode scanner, Phil Bourque's voice comes on and tells you that you are in the wrong room. Pretty funny.

So we wind our way past the suites, and finally enter the Lexus club, which is set up to be a fine dining establishment. Granted, it does cater to high-end clientale, and some jabronies like myself, but they took it too high scale. It's still a hockey game, not a funderaiser in the Hamptons. Hockey jerseys and hats are still worn during the meal, yet the ambiance of the place does not fit the mood of the event.

Can't complain about the meal, pork tenderloin, duck, elk, pasta, the best Caesar salad this side of the real Caesar's Palace.



After finishing up the meal, minus desert, I have learned not to eat the desert, while delicious, it will fill you up and ruin your game watching ability, we made the ridiculous walk to our seats.

Our seats were two rows above the visitor's penalty box, pretty sweet, a little too close in that some of the views are obstructed, but so close to the action that you can actually hear Crosby say "fuck."

Don't get me wrong, I'm a huge Jeff Jimerson fan, but with Mike Comrie and Mike Fisher in this game, I was hoping that their wives, Hillary Duff and Carrie Underwood would have dueling National Anthems in bikinis. Now that would be patriotic.

On an unpatriotic note, I do like the Canadian Anthem. As Larry David would say, its pretty good.

The game starts, Pens vs. Sens, Brent Johnson and his 3-0 record is in net. I can't argue with what Bylsma is doing. Yes, he has a very highly paid goaltender, with a Stanley Cup to his credit, sitting on the bench, but you have to go with the hot hand, and right now that is Johnson. Whatever needs to happen for the Pens to win is fine by me. And to back up Bylsma's decision, Johnson didn't disappoint.

Game starts off with both teams trading penalties back and forth. No dice for either side. Chris Neil then serves a penalty for too many men. Kinda fitting if you ask me. After the first unit looks blah, the second unit comes on, and after a great keep in by Paul Martin, Mark Letestu roofs the shot to give the Pens a 1-0 lead.

Not too much longer, the box is revisited by our old friend Chris Neil. Alex Goligoski takes a shot, it jumps off the new boards right to Sidney Crosby's stick. Easy. Sid couldn't let Letestu hold the team lead in goals, so he made quick work and tied it back up.

Going into the game there was a quiet anticipation being that it was Sergei Gonchar's return to the burgh. I will never say anything bad about the guy. Yeah he started off like crap, and his last game as a Pen was crap, but that time in between he was a solid as any offensive-minded defender could be. He joined the Pens during the dark ages, a time when Ziggy Palffey couldn't even last a season without getting frustrated and retiring. But Gonch held on, captained our Powerplay, lugged the puck into the zone when noone else could, always got the puck to the net, buried timely goals, played underrated d, and raised the Cup. All in all a great stint in the black and vegas gold. Sure he left in the offseason, he got the extra year he wanted and made some bank. The Pens wanted him, he wanted the Pens, but at days end the figures didn't line up and Gonch was sent packing. Great guy, great teammate, and great hockey player. He will be missed in Pittsburgh.

A nice standing O by the Pens faithful. Gotta love the song.



So the first continues, Malkin can't let everyone else have all the fun, makes a diving play at a puck and puts it in the twine.

Then we get another visit from our buddy Neil. He's a dick. A less skilled Matt Cooke, but with better fighting chops. Everyone has seen Deryk Engelland knockout of Colton Orr, so of course Neil challenges Engelland. They turn in a pretty good fight. I would call it a draw, but there was some heavy punches thrown.



Finally intermission. My bladder was about at its limit, so after a hike up Mount Kilamanjaro, I finally made it to the pisser. I would have thought it would be bigger to accomodate more people at once, but it wasn't bad.

The second begins and the Pens hold the vaunted 3-0 lead. Daniel Alfredsson and his gingerness rain on the parade and he sends a laser far post over Johnson's glove. 3-1.

Well the Pens said the hell with this, and scored 2 quick goals back-to-back. One from Pascal Dupuis and his October mustache, and the other from Kris Letang. The second also brought us the Kiss cam, which focused on gold digging wives with old ugly men. Comical in its own right.

The Senators come out early and score, which puts a dent in our plans for an early exit that would lead to the Rivers for some blackjack. We had initially planned to leave at the 12 minute mark if the score was still 5-1, but with the Sens tally we moved our exit time to 8 minutes.

Mike Rupp and Matt Carkner get into a fight, followed by Ben Lovejoy, the best Christmas name of all time, and guess who, Chris Neil. They kick Neil out of society and we don't see him again. Jarkko Ruutu and Crosby were getting ready to mix it up, but I guess even Ruutu knows better than to mess with Crosby, and the two former teammates skate away. So Carkner is this massive human being. We sat so close to the box that we had a great view of him, he is just huge. So while the refs were squaring up the penalties, Carkner and Crosby were jawing at each other through the glass. Gotta love Crosby but he would get demolished. His yapper was only running because the mammoth was behind two panes of glass. Crosby kept saying, "Who the fuck are you?" which was probably a legit question coming from the face of the NHL.

As if it were meant to be, there was a stoppage at exactly the 8 minute mark, and we climbed up the stairs and made our way out of the arena.

Off to the Rivers, after some beautiful blackjack play, I left Pittsburgh up $100 on the night.

Good news for Pens fans, Jordan Staal practiced today for the first time since their playoff exit to the Habs in May.

My impressions of the arena are:

It's a nice place, a much needed and definate upgrade to Mellon/Civic.

Didn't get to walk around it much, but it seemed pretty high tech and upscale.

The staff wasn't too friendly

The staff had no idea what was going on. This is the first time people have been here, they don't know where they are going, the staff is needed to direct. Nope. They don't know where they are even going.

Jumbo Tron is awesome. Would make a way bigger explosion if Jean-Claude got a hold of this one.



Seats were comfortable, better than the stone-age cloth ones at the old building. They were also wider to accomodate fat asses, and they actually had cup holders so you don't have to worry about kicking over your $7 beer. However, the cup holders are too small for the beers and the beers get stuck, and you have a rough go at pulling them out, and ultimately spill some and because of frustration, end up holding your beer anyways.

I don't know its a nice place, gonna take some time to learn my way around, and take in all the sights, but it definately is an upgrade, and the team deserves to play in something other than a minor league facility.

Junior's Wild Night (NBA Preview #2)


I drove by the newly-dubbed “Seau’s Cliff” today. The “accident” occurred in the early hours this morning and the SUV had been towed away hours ago, but they still had one lane blocked off to handle the immense news coverage this is getting. The cliff is about 40 feet high and it’s gradual enough that if you drive over the edge, you’re tires would stay in contact with the ground the entire way until you go head first into the sand. In a large SUV, you are going to be injured, maybe even severely, but odds are pretty slim that you’re going to die. Who knows what was actually going on in Junior’s head, but it’s fun to speculate.

The glass half empty approach is that Seau hit his girlfriend around midnight. She called the cops, who came and arrested him around 1:30 am. He posted bail and on his way down the coast, saw the cliff in the moonlight and had a flashback to Thelma & Louise. And really, it would be a pretty good way to go, flooring it off a cliff. The problem in this case was that he chose the wrong cliff. Driving down what amounts to being a very steep hill with a sandy bottom is like trying to commit suicide by shooting yourself in the leg. Sure, there’s a chance you could hit an artery and bleed to death, but if you really want to go through with it, there are ways to guarantee the outcome.

The glass half full approach is that he got in an argument with his girlfriend, who, in an effort to get back at him for being too awesome, called the cops and claimed he hit her. They came to the scene and were forced to take him to the station for questioning (presumably about the 1994 AFC Championship Game.) After pictures and autographs, they released him. He decided to go for a drive down the coast so he could get some thinking done about the next logical move for his charity, when he fell asleep behind the wheel and slowly drifted over the embankment.

Odds are, the truth is somewhere in the middle. (My guess is that he was rightfully arrested and fell asleep on the way home.) But, in the spirit of Junior Seau’s exciting night, I’m going to go over some best case, worst case scenarios for the NBA season.




Knicks and Amare’s $100 million contract


Glass half-full
: Amare has a great first year in Mike D’Antoni’s offense (26 ppg and 8.5 rpg) and, most importantly, stays healthy. Next offseason, they use their remaining salary cap space to sign Carmelo to a long term, similar contract and include Raymond Felton, Wilson Chandler, and a pick in a sign-and-trade with the Spurs for Tony Parker-Longoria. (I don’t think landing Chris Paul and Carmelo is realistic, although Paul would be amazing with D’Antoni.) The Knicks, starting Amare, Carmelo, Parker-Longoria, Anthony Randolph, and Toney Douglas, are rising just as the Celtics are falling, and they spend the next five years battling with the Heat for Eastern Conference supremacy in a revival of the late 90’s rivalry, only with polar opposite teams from the earlier edition.

Glass half-empty
: Amare blows out his knee again in February, right about the time the Nuggets trade Carmelo to the Nets for Derrick Favors, etc. Carmelo signs a long term deal with the Nets to be the face of the new Brooklyn franchise. Chris Paul sees a gimpy Amare in Manhattan or a young, up-and-coming, Carmelo led team in Brooklyn and decides to take a small pay cut to join the latter. Amare, coming off another surgery, looks around to see Danilo Gallinari, Toney Douglas, Bill Walker, and Timofey Mozgov joining him in the starting five with no help in sight. He becomes completely disinterested and as the pressure from the New York media grows, he tries to demand a trade. Only no team wants to touch a contract like that on a disgruntled, injury prone big man who can only create if he has a good point guard with which to run the pick and roll.




The Cleveland Cavaliers


Glass half-full
: I can’t come up with anything. They win the draft lottery, I guess.

Glass half-empty: Really the glass is about 99% empty. JJ Hickson and Mo Williams lead the team to the worst record in the league, but despite having the best odds, they pull the 11th pick in the draft and select Nolan Smith out of Duke.




Boston Celtics

Glass half-full
: Rondo continues the transition of taking over leadership of the team, averaging a solid 17-6-9 line. Big Baby is able to keep his emotions under control and he plays well enough to let KG keep his minutes around 25 through the first 4 months of the season. The O’Neal brothers, Jermaine and Shaquille, are able to split the load while Kendrick Perkins gets healthy. When Perkins comes back after the All-Star break, Shaq fakes a toe injury to rest up for an imminent second round matchup with Orlando. Nate Robinson provides a spark off the bench and they close out the Magic at home in Game 6. In the Eastern Finals, the Heat don’t have anyone to contend with Rondo. When they try to move Wade or Lebron to him, Pierce and Ray Allen kill them and they advance to face the Lakers. Kobe goes 7 for 25 from the floor in game 7, Artest bricks a 3 in the final minute, and Shaq finally gets his revenge on Kobe, evening up the championship count at five.

Glass half-empty
: Rondo’s confidence is shattered after being cut from the Team USA this summer. He has to take a leave of absence from the team to try to get his head right. In his absence, the veterans are forced to watch Nate Robinson continually take the outlet pass and pull up from 25 feet. An internet video surfaces of Shaq furiously chasing Nate in the locker room after a 20 point loss in Atlanta. The O’Neal brothers, KG, and Big Baby all go down to injuries and they are forced to re-sign Brian Scalabrine as their sixth man. Rumors swirl about Delonte West sleeping with an undisclosed teammate’s mother. Doc Rivers finally grows tired of this team and ends up broadcasting the Celtics first round loss to the Bulls.



The Big Three in Miami


Glass half-full
: This one’s pretty easy. Lebron accepts the facilitator role and averages the first triple double since Oscar Robertson. Wade plays exactly the way he has played his entire career, driving the ball and taking the last shot. Chris Bosh doesn’t have to worry about creating his own points, so he learns how to play defense and focuses on rebounding, averaging an 18-11. They run through the East with ease. In the finals, Bosh and Gasol cancel each other out, Kobe is drained from guarding Wade, and Artest can’t handle Lebron going to the hoop. Heat in 6.

Glass half-empty
: There aren’t enough shots to go around. Rumors begin coming out of the Heat camp about underlying animosity brewing between Lebron and Wade. The hatred from opposing fans starts to get at Lebron and he begins to think everyone except Maverick Carter is against him. He wears headphones constantly in the locker room and moves his locker next to Shavlik Randolph, to try to get away from anyone that matters. Bosh goes down to injury and they are forced to rotate a Haslem-Juwan Howard-Big Z-Jamal Mcgloire front line. Pat Reilly gets fed up with a lackluster start and replaces the player-popular Erik Spoelstra with himself. The players revolt because of the treatment to Spoelstra and the team eases it’s way to a first round defeat in a 4-5 matchup with Atlanta. (This one was fun to think about.)




Chicago Bulls

(By the way, I just looked at their roster and realized they signed Brian Scalabrine for $800,000 this year. Apparently, they felt their team was lacking a comedic factor going into the season.)

Glass half-full
: Scalabrine never has to see the court. Derrick Rose parlays his Team USA experience into an MVP season. They make the right move, holding onto Deng and Noah through the trade deadline. Noah and Boozer frustrate the Heat enough to pull off a shocker in the second round. They have another epic series against the Celtics, with Rose and Rondo battling to prove which one should have truly been the point guard for the US this past summer. KG is too worn down to handle Boozer and the Bulls pull out another mild upset. Unfortunately, even in the best case scenario, I don’t think they have enough to match-up with the Lakers.

Glass half-empty
: Kyle Korver goes cold and, with no one else to truly stretch defenses, opposing teams can crowd the paint to control drives from Boozer and Rose. The team panics and gives up Deng, Noah, and a couple of first rounders for Carmelo. Without Noah there to be a pest, the Celtics or Magic are able to exploit their lack of front line depth and knock them out in the first round. They are able to sign Melo to a long term deal, but with no help coming from the draft for the next two years, they are forced to rely on the development of Taj Gibson. I still would like their team over the next few years, with or without Carmelo.


I’ll go over the Western Conference sometime before the season starts. Stay tuned.

Monday, October 18, 2010

10 Impressions from the first 10 days of the NHL season



1) Toronto is more than just a surprise, they are a contender: The Leaf's are 4-0 through 4, in stark contrast from last year when they did not win their 4th game until November 21st. GM Brian Burke made the major move of the trade deadline last year with the acquisition of franchise defenseman Dion Phanuef. He also acquired reliable goaltender J.S. Giguere and both have been revived playing in the biggest hockey market in the world. A healthy Phil Kessel for the start of the season has also been key for Toronto as he has 4 goals through 4 and looks to be the feared sniper Burke expected when he traded for his services. Kessel has meshed well with linemates (C) Tyler Boziak and free agent addition (LW) Kris Versteeg to form a potent number 1 line that coach Ron Wilson has leaned on through their start. Another off-season addition, second liner Clarke MacArthur leads the team with 5 goals and due to their new found depth the Leaf's have been able to run out four lines consistently this season. In true Brian Burke fashion this team has been built from the net out with Giguere and Gustavsson between the pipes being complemented with Phaneuf, Beauchemin, Kaberle, Komisarek, and Scheen on the back end. The depth on both offense and defense will allow the Leaf's to contend this season and the rebuilding job in Toronto is a couple of years ahead of schedule.


2) The Stars look to be this year's Phoenix Coyotes: The Stars are also 4-0 with 2 wins coming in shootouts and one in OT and look remarkably like last year's Coyotes who were the surprise team of the league. The Stars like the Coyotes have gotten off to a fast start that no one expected due to their ability to win games decieded after regulation and both teams have similar ownership issues. Stars owner Tom Hicks has forced GM Joe Nieuwendyk to keep the payroll near the floor of the cap while the Coyotes were owned by the NHL and faced the same monetary issues. Dallas has relied on the steady goaltending of Kari Lehtonen who has a GAA of 2.39 and a save % of .932, and the most under the radar stars in the league in Brad Richards (2 goals, 7 assists, +7) and Loui Eriksson (4 goals, 1 assist, +7). If Lehtonen can continue his solid play with the help of the Stars team focus on defense I expect this team to mirror the success of the Coyotes last year and finish in the top half of the western conference playoff picture.


3) The Canadians management might have been on to something: When the Canadians traded goalie and playoff hero Jaroslav Halak to the Blues in the offseason the Canadian fans made their displeasure known through near riots. The Canadian's management had always been Carey Price supporters and they went "all in" when they traded Halak who led the overmatched Canadians to upset victories over Washington and Pittsburgh last season. Halak has been as a good as expected in St. Louis with a 2.00 GAA and .909 save percentage and is the Blues' look time solution in net. Carey Price has rewarded the Canadian's faith in him by coming into the season in shape and focused, in typical Canadian fashion he has been forced to face a lot of rubber and has performed well through five with a 2.57 GAA and .914 save percentage. Price looks to be the franchise goaltender the team thought he was when they gave him the job as a 21 year old and by trading Halak while his value was high they were able to get back prized prospect Lars Eller, who was the 13th pick in the 07' draft. Eller should be the #1 center in Montreal soon and this will be viewed as an ideal trade that benefited both teams and a win for the Canadian's management.


4) The Central division in the NHL's best: There are no easy nights in this division that is occupied by the defending champ Blackhawks, Red Wings, Predators, Blues, and Blue Jackets. The Hawks (3-2-1) were forced to get under the cap in the off-season, but still have all of their young skill and look poised to make another run this season with Marian Hossa back after injury. The Red Wings (3-1-1) look to be back to the same old Red Wings and with Jimmy Howard on the verge of stardom in net this could be the first Red Wing team in memory that has a goalie capable of winning games on his own. The Predators (3-0-1) are the most underrated team in the league and are a team no one wants to see come playoff time. The Blues (2-1-1) have built through the draft over the past five years and have a young core that reminds me of the recent Pens and Hawks teams (Perron, Backes, Oshie, Johnson) and the addition of Halak in net makes the Blues a team on the verge. Columbus (2-2-0) looks to be the only team in the division that would be a stretch to make the playoffs and that is mostly due to their division heavy schedule.


5) Washington wouldn't run away with the Southeast like last year: The Caps were the only team in the division to make the playoffs last season (even if it was only for 6 games) and won the division by an outlandish 30 points. That wouldn't happen this year for a couple reasons; first off the Caps know their entire season will be judged on the playoffs so look for more than the usual nights off for the Caps better players and rest at any hint of injury like Mike Green already this week. The bigger reason why this division will not be a run-away is that the other teams have improved. Tampa Bay (3-1) will be more than just Stamkos and St. Louis under GM Steve Yzerman, and his hand-picked coach Guy Boucher will get more out of this talented roster. Atlanta (3-2-0) was the biggest benefactors from the Hawks off-season fire-sale and with early wins over Washington and San Jose they look to be a young team that is more than feisty. Carolina (2-2-0) is only a year removed from a trip to the conference finals with the same core and Florida (2-2) might have the worst offense in the NHL, but as they proved on their western conference road trip they don't need to score too many with goalie Tomas Vokoun (1.26 GAA, .952 Save %, 2 shutouts).


6) Colorado's young guys are resilient: The Avalanche were a popular pick to take a step back this year after making the playoffs last year and scaring the Sharks in the first round. The first five games of this season were difficult with a home game vs. Chicago followed by road games @Philly, Det, NJ, NYI, the Avalanche came through this stretch at 3-2 and their young guys played well during this opening stretch. Center's Paul Stastny (2 goals, 3 assists) and Matt Duchene (1 goal 4 assists) lead two quality lines and wingers Chris Stewart (3 goals, 2 assists) and TJ Galiardi (2 goals, 1 assist) have shown the ability to finish against good teams. The defense is a little thin and the Av's need Craig Anderson (2.99 GAA, .915 Save %) to continue to handle all the action in their end, but this opening 5 game stretch proved that talk of their step back this season is off base.


7) Can the Pens contend with Brent Johnson as their goalie: The Pens have little room for error with a team that is short on quality wingers who can finish and a defense that is more transition than shutdown, so quality goaltending is the difference between wins and losses. Brent Johnson is 3-0 with a 1.32 GAA and a .953 Save % while Marc Andre Fleury is 0-3 with a 3.41 GAA and a .853 Save %. These stats are even more startling when you consider Johnson beat the Isles at home and has road victories over the Devils and Flyers. It will be interesting to see if this is just a rough patch for Fluery or if there are bigger problems, but as the Blackhawks proved last year sometimes you need to bench the salary cap anchor and ride the guy who is hot.


8) Are the Devils suffering from "Stockholm Syndrome": When former player John MacLean replaced Jacques Lemaire as coach of the Devils the prevailing sentiment was that the skilled Devil forwards would really blossom in an up tempo system and the Devils would be (gasp) exciting. Instead the forwards have been non-existent on offense and major liabilities on defense and have Devil fans pinning for the days of Lemaire, his trap, and wins. The Devils are 1-4-1, -11 in goal differential and are lead in goals by big money free agent Kovalchuk and re-acquired Jason Arnott with only 2. Meanwhile Kovy is (-3) and Arnott is (-7) joining the likes of captain Jamie Langenbrunner (-6), Zubrus (-5) and Tallinder (-5).


9) Is this first family of hockey going to be the first casualties of the season in Calgary: It looked to be the perfect situation when coach Brent Sutter left New Jersey two seasons ago to join his brother Daryl the GM in Calgary. The Flames were built on solid defense, goaltending, and opportunistic offense and the roster looked to be ideal for Brent to turn them into contenders. Instead the team has underperformed and more importantly has looked uninterested and has failed to compete on a nightly basis. Last season's blockbuster trade that sent Phaneuf to Toronto brought back Matt Stajan and Hagman, neither whom have ignited the offense and free agency brought back two Flame re-treads in Ollie Jokinen and Alex Tanguay. After a 1-2 start and an ugly home shutout loss to Florida the team had a two hour pre-practice meeting where everyone was given a chance to speak their peace. The Flames rallied for a third period comeback victory in their next game vs. Edmonton, but that still leaves them with 3 well played periods out of 12 this year. The combination of poor roster moves, the inability to get this team motivated, and lengthy pre-practice meetings 3 games into the season does not bode well for Sutter brothers and me personally as it would be hard for me to fathom a Flame team without a Sutter in charge.


10) What has happened to the better goaltenders around the league: I already talked about Marc-Andre Fluery (0-3, 3.41 GAA, .853 Save %) and he is not alone in the struggling goaltender category. Martin Brodeur (1-3-1, 3.18 GAA, .887 Save %), Ryan Miller (1-3-1, 2.63 GAA, .911 Save %), Roberto Luongo (1-2-1, 2.46 GAA, .920 Save %), Miika Kiprusoff (2-2, 2.75 GAA, .893 Save %), Antii Niemi (1-1, 3.05 GAA, .900 Save %) all have struggled early in the season. I wouldn't push the panic button yet on this small sample size, but it will be an interesting trend to follow.